If you ever wonder what skunk mixed with mildew and urine smells like, come driving through our beautiful agricultural countryside. I have no image because it cannot convey odor. All I know is that Industrial Hemp is our new cash crop (the new hazelnut, which at least smells amazing as a drink add-on), and it is showing up all along my daily drives. I’m not against the plant on principle. I even received a coupon for CBD at your nearest Kroger store if you would like it. My body’s aching all the time, too, but my olfactories are beginning to ache. Is there such a thing as Stench Syndrome? We may start seeing an uptick in cases.

[This Public Service Announcement is brought to you by disgusted noses throughout the Willamette Valley.]

The front field is leased to a stranger whose info we couldn’t find. When they dug up their usual hay and prepped it for a new crop, we thought in horror it might be industrial hemp. Oh, sweet salvation the day we realized hemp requires irrigation and we don’t have any!